Bored at Walmart

 
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annarere1960
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PostPosted: Sat Dec 09, 2006 11:23 pm    Post subject: Bored at Walmart Reply with quote

Mr. and Mrs. Fenton are retired, and Mrs. Fenton insists her husband go with her to Walmart, but he gets bored with all the shopping trips. He prefers to get in and get out, but Mrs. Fenton loves to browse.

Here's a letter sent to Mrs. Fenton from Walmart:

Dear Mrs. Fenton,

Over the past six months, your husband has been causing quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behavior and may ban both of you from our property.
We have documented all incidents on our video surveillance equipment. All complaints against Mr. Fenton are listed below.

Things Mr. Bill Fenton has done while his spouse was shopping in Walmart:

1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they weren't looking.
2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in House wares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.
4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official tone, Code 3' in house wares..... And watched what happened.
5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and asked to put a bag of M&M's on layaway.
6. September 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
7. September 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told other shoppers he'd invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.
8. September 23: When a clerk asked if they can help him, he begins to cry and asks, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone.
9. October 4: Looked right into the security camera; used it as a mirror, and picked his nose.
10. November 10. While handling guns in the hunting department, asked the clerk if he knows where the antidepressants are.
11. December 3: Darted around the store suspiciously loudly humming the “Mission Impossible" theme.
12. December 6: In the auto department, practiced his "Madonna look" using different size funnels.
13. December 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browse through, yelled "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"
14. December 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumes the fetal position and screams "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!

And last, but not least:

15. December 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile, and then yelled very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!"

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Last edited by annarere1960 on Sun Dec 10, 2006 6:06 pm; edited 2 times in total
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daripper
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PostPosted: Sat Dec 09, 2006 11:40 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

LOL!!!! he really must have been bored Laughing Laughing Laughing
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kveits007
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PostPosted: Sun Dec 10, 2006 7:14 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Thats funny, I can see some one doing that at a Wal Mart
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tkboxer
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PostPosted: Sun Dec 10, 2006 11:31 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

LMAO... Laughing Laughing Laughing I'm going to have to try some of those!
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phil6580
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PostPosted: Mon Dec 11, 2006 10:20 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

LMAO. Thats bloody fantastic. Laughing Laughing
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drastija
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PostPosted: Mon Dec 11, 2006 11:07 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Very Happy LOL Very Happy
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fatheralice
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PostPosted: Mon Dec 11, 2006 1:53 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Those are great - I must try some of them Laughing
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SG1_Fan
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PostPosted: Wed Dec 13, 2006 9:07 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Very funny,printing out now to go to work with me Thanks
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spartanstew
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PostPosted: Wed Dec 13, 2006 3:46 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I'll definately do the last one sometime.
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herk
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PostPosted: Fri Dec 15, 2006 5:30 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

hahahah that was great.
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nightowl
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PostPosted: Mon Dec 18, 2006 4:24 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Laughing Laughing good one anna Very Happy
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PostPosted: Tue Dec 26, 2006 9:43 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Those are great.
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