fatheralice
Donator
Joined: 03 Oct 2005
Posts: 320
Location: uk
|
 Posted: Wed Jan 03, 2007 1:10 pm Post subject: Aussie Radio |
 |
|
A radio station in Australia ran a phone-in competition to find the
most embarrassing moment in listener's lives. The final four were
4th Place.
While in line at the bank one afternoon, my toddler decided to
release some pent-up energy and started to run amuck. I was finally
able to grab hold of her after receiving looks of disgust and annoyance from other patrons. I told her that if she didn't start behaving I would smack her. She looked me in the eye and said in a voice just as threatening, If you don't let me go right now, I will tell Grandma I saw you kissing Daddy's willie last night. After this enlightening exchange, the silence was deafening.
Even the tellers stopped what they were doing. I mustered the last of my dignity and walked out of the bank, with my daughter in tow. The last thing
I heard as the door closed behind me was screams of laughter.
3rd Place.
It was the day before my 18th birthday. I was living at home, but my
parents had gone out for the evening, so I invited my girlfriend over
for a romantic night alone. As we lay in bed after making love, we
heard the telephone ringing downstairs. I suggested to my girlfriend
that I give her a piggy-back ride down to the phone. Since we didn't
want to miss the call, we didn't have time to get dressed. When we
got to the bottom of the stairs, the lights suddenly came on as a
whole crowd of people yelled SURPRISE My entire family - parents, the
relations as well as my friends, were standing there. My girlfriend
and I were frozen on the spot in a state of shock and embarrassment
for what seemed like an eternity, since then, no one in my family has
planned any surprise parties.
2nd Place.
A lady picked up several items at a discount store. When she finally
got up to the checkout, she learned that one of the items had no price
tag.
The checkout girl got on the public address system, which boomed out
across the store for everyone to hear, Price check for Tampax super
size.
Then it got worse.. Someone at the rear of the store apparently
misunderstood the word Tampax for Thumbtacks, a guy, his voice
booming over the same public address system: Do you want the kind you
push in with your thumb or the kind you belt in with a hammer? "
1st Place.
And the winner is.
This happened at a major Australian University during a biology
lecture a professor was discussing the high glucose levels found in
semen. A young woman raised her hand and asked, if I understand you
correctly, you are saying there is as much glucose in male semen as
in sugar? The professor responded, yes, that's correct, adding some
statistical data to his lecture.
Raising her hand again, the girl asked, then why doesn't it taste
sweet?
After a stunned silence, the whole class burst out laughing. The poor
girl turned bright red, and as she realised exactly what she had
inadvertently said, she picked up her books, and without another
word, walked out of the class - As she was heading for the door, the
professor's reply was a classic.
Totally straight faced, he answered her question. It doesn't taste sweet because the taste-buds for sweetness are on the tip of your tongue and not in the back of your throat.
 |
|
