| View previous topic :: View next topic | 
	
	
		| Author | Message | 
	
		| blknight3 Lifetime Member
 
  
  
 Joined: 19 May 2005
 Posts: 1254
 Location: Canada
 
 | 
			
				|  Posted: Mon Mar 26, 2007 1:45 pm    Post subject: BIRTH ORDER OF CHILDREN: |   |  
				| 
 |  
				| BIRTH ORDER OF CHILDREN: 
 
 1st baby: You begin wearing maternity clothes as soon as your OB/GYN
 confirms your pregnancy.
 
 2nd baby: You wear your regular clothes for as long as possible.
 
 3rd baby: Your maternity clothes ARE your regular clothes.
 _____________________________________________________
 Preparing for the Birth:
 
 1st baby: You practice your breathing religiously.
 
 2nd baby: You don't bother because you remember that last time, breathing didn't' t do a thing.
 
 3rd baby: You ask for an epidural in your eighth month
 ______________________________________________________
 The Layette :
 
 1st baby: You pre-wash newborn's clothes, color-coordinate them, and fold them neatly in the baby's little bureau.
 
 2nd baby: You check to make sure that the clothes are clean and discard only the ones with the darkest stains.
 
 3rd baby: Boys can wear pink, can't they?
 ______________________________________________________
 Worries:
 
 1st baby: At the first sign of distress--a whimper, a frown--you pick up the baby.
 
 2nd baby: You pick the baby up when her wails threaten to wake your firstborn.
 
 3rd baby: You teach your three-year-old how to rewind the mechanical swing
 ______________________________________________________
 Pacifier:
 
 1st baby: If the pacifier falls on the floor, you put it away until you can go home and
 
 wash and boil it.
 
 2nd baby: When the pacifier falls on the floor, you squirt it off with some juice from the baby's bottle.
 
 3rd baby: You wipe it off on your shirt and pop it back in.
 ______________________________________________________
 Diapering:
 
 1st baby: You change your baby's diapers every hour, whether they need it or not.
 
 2nd baby: You change their diaper every two to three hours, if needed.
 
 3rd baby: You try to change their diaper before others start to complain about the smell or you see it sagging to their knees.
 
 ______________________________________________________
 Activities:
 
 1st baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics, Baby Swing, and Baby Story Hour.
 
 2nd baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics.
 
 3rd baby: You take your infant to the supermarket and the dry cleaner.
 ______________________________________________________
 Going Out:
 
 1st baby: The first time you leave your baby with a sitter, you call home five times.
 
 2nd baby: Just before you walk out the door, you remember to leave a number where you can be reached.
 
 3rd baby: You leave instructions for the sitter to call only if she sees blood.
 ______________________________________________________
 At Home:
 
 1st baby: You spend a good bit of every day just gazing at the baby.
 
 2nd baby: You spend a bit of everyday watching to be sure your older child isn't squeezing, poking, or hitting the baby.
 
 3rd baby: You spend a little bit of every day hiding from the children.
 ______________________________________________________
 Swallowing Coins (a favorite):
 
 1st child: When first child swallows a coin, you rush the child to the hospital and demand x-rays.
 
 2nd child: When second child swallows a coin, you carefully watch for the coin to pass.
 
 3rd child: When third child swallows a coin you deduct it from his allowance!
 ______________________________________________________
 
 GRANDCHILDREN:
 God's reward for allowing your children to live.
 _________________
 For every person with a spark of genius, there are a hundred with ignition trouble.
 |  | 
	
		| Back to top |  | 
	
		|  | 
	
		| nightowl Limited Membership
 
  
  
 Joined: 14 Jul 2005
 Posts: 1976
 Location: canada
 
 | 
			
				|  Posted: Tue Mar 27, 2007 5:37 am    Post subject: |   |  
				| 
 |  
				|    very good blknight3.....I liked this one and I have forwarded it to my wife I think she will enjoy it too   
 We are about to start countdown with about 4 weeks to go
  _________________
 
  |  | 
	
		| Back to top |  | 
	
		|  | 
	
		| daripper *Resident Artist
 
  
  
 Joined: 25 Apr 2005
 Posts: 3144
 Location: TN. USA
 
 | 
			
				|  Posted: Tue Mar 27, 2007 3:42 pm    Post subject: |   |  
				| 
 |  
				| LOL!!!!!      _________________
 Site Moderator
 ---------------------------------------------------------------------
 He who never asks the question will never know the answer.
 My name is 0110010001100001011100100110100101110000011100000110010101110010
 |  | 
	
		| Back to top |  | 
	
		|  | 
	
		| drastija Exceptional Member
 
  
  
 Joined: 13 Nov 2006
 Posts: 955
 Location: Osijek, Croatia
 
 | 
			
				|  Posted: Wed Mar 28, 2007 12:00 am    Post subject: |   |  
				| 
 |  
				|  LOL  _________________
 "Once you have flown, you will walk the earth with your eyes turned skyward,
 for there you have been, there you long to return."
 Leonardo da Vinci
 |  | 
	
		| Back to top |  | 
	
		|  | 
	
		| annarere1960 *Member
 
  
  
 Joined: 07 May 2005
 Posts: 1863
 Location: United States
 
 | 
			
				|  Posted: Thu Mar 29, 2007 7:23 am    Post subject: |   |  
				| 
 |  
				| that was awesome _________________
 The heaviest baggage for a traveler is an empty wallet.
 
  |  | 
	
		| Back to top |  | 
	
		|  | 
	
		| phil6580 Donator
 
  
  
 Joined: 04 May 2005
 Posts: 1004
 Location: Tyneside UK
 
 | 
			
				|  Posted: Fri Mar 30, 2007 5:11 am    Post subject: |   |  
				| 
 |  
				| Very funny.    |  | 
	
		| Back to top |  | 
	
		|  | 
	
		| sawtooth Exceptional Member
 
  
  
 Joined: 27 Apr 2005
 Posts: 874
 Location: North Carolina
 
 | 
			
				|  Posted: Tue Apr 03, 2007 9:23 pm    Post subject: |   |  
				| 
 |  
				| I loved that! |  | 
	
		| Back to top |  | 
	
		|  | 
	
		|  |