HAPPY CANADA DAY!!!!!

 
Post new topic   Reply to topic    DVDCoverArt.org Forum Index :: Humor Us!
View previous topic :: View next topic  
Author Message
blknight3
Lifetime Member
Lifetime Member


Joined: 19 May 2005
Posts: 1254
Location: Canada

PostPosted: Mon Jul 02, 2007 5:49 pm    Post subject: HAPPY CANADA DAY!!!!! Reply with quote

TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN BRITISH COLUMBIA



1. Vancouver: 1.5 million people and two bridges. You do the math.
2. Your $400,000 Vancouver home is just 5 hours from downtown.
3. You can throw a rock and hit three Starbucks locations.
4. There is always some sort of deforestation protest going on.
5. Weed

TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ALBERTA


1. Big rock between you and B.C.
2. Ottawa who?
3. Tax is 6% instead of approximately 200% as it is for the rest of the
country.
4. You can exploit almost any natural resource you can think of.
5. You live in the only province that could actually afford to be its own
country.
6. The Americans below you are all in anti-government militia groups.


TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN SASKATCHEWAN

1. You never run out of wheat.
2. Your province is really easy to draw.
3. You can watch the dog run away from home for hours.
4. People will assume you live on a farm.


TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN MANITOBA


1. You wake up one morning to find that you suddenly have a beachfront
property.
2. Hundreds of huge, horribly frigid lakes.
3. Nothing compares to a wicked Winnipeg winter.
4. You can be an Easterner or a Westerner depending on your mood.
5. You can pass the time watching trucks and barns float by.


TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ONTARIO

1. You live in the centre of the universe.
2. Your $400,000 Toronto home is actually a dump.
3. You and you alone decide who will win the federal election.
4. The only province with hard-core American-style crime.


TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN QUEBEC


1. Racism is socially acceptable
2. You can take bets with your friends on which English neighbour will
move out next.
3. Other provinces basically bribe you to stay in Canada.
4. You can blame all your problems on the "Anglo *#!%!"


TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK


1. One way or another, the government gets 98% of your income.
2. You are poor, but not as poor as the Newfies.
3. No one ever blames anything on New Brunswick
4. Everybody has a grandfather who runs a lighthouse.


TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NOVA SCOTIA


1. Everyone can play the fiddle. The ones who can't, think they can.
2. You can pretend to have Scottish heritage as an excuse to get drunk and
wear a kilt.
3. You are the only reason Anne Murray makes money.


TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN PRINCE EDWARD ISLAND


1. Even though more people live on Vancouver Island, you still got the
big, new bridge.
2. You can walk across the province in half an hour.
3. You can drive across the province in two minutes.
4. Everyone has been an extra on "Road to Avonlea."
5. This is where all those tiny, red potatoes come from.
6. You can confuse ships by turning your porch lights on and off at night.


TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEWFOUNDLAND


1. If Quebec separates, you will float off to sea.
2. If you do something stupid, you have a built-in excuse.
3. The workday is about two hours long.
4. It is socially acceptable to wear your hip waders to your wedding
_________________
For every person with a spark of genius, there are a hundred with ignition trouble.
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
tkboxer
Resident Artist
Resident Artist


Joined: 15 May 2005
Posts: 1610

PostPosted: Wed Jul 04, 2007 1:10 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I'm not Canadian but I know enough about the country to enjoy the humor here. Laughing Very funny stuff.
_________________
No matter how many times you try...you can't clone the dirt off your screen.
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
herk
Exceptional Member
Exceptional Member


Joined: 22 Apr 2005
Posts: 355

PostPosted: Fri Jul 06, 2007 4:37 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

thanx. I love the one about Vancouver. I used to go there every year, and I remember one year, I was walking around on Robson and I saw 3 starbucks on 3 of the 4 corners. It was crazy.
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
Display posts from previous:   
Post new topic   Reply to topic    DVDCoverArt.org Forum Index :: Humor Us! All times are GMT - 7 Hours
Page 1 of 1

 
Jump to:  
You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot vote in polls in this forum




Powered by phpBB © 2001, 2002 phpBB Group
Charcoal2 Theme © Zarron Media