MacDonalds will hire anybody

[phil6580]

This is an actual job application that a 17-year-old boy submitted at a McDonald’s restaurant in Florida; and they hired him because he was so honest and funny!

NAME: Greg Bulmash.

SEX: Not yet. Still waiting for the right person.

DESIRED POSITION: Company’s President or Vice President. But seriously, whatever’s available. If I was in a position to be picky, I wouldn’t be applying here in the first place.

DESIRED SALARY: $185,000 a year plus stock options and a Michael Ovitz style severance package. If that’s not possible, make an offer and we can haggle.

EDUCATION: Yes.

LAST POSITION HELD: Target for middle management hostility.

SALARY: Less than I’m worth.

MOST NOTABLE ACHIEVEMENT: My incredible collection of stolen pens and ‘post-it’ notes.

REASON FOR LEAVING: It sucked.

AVAILABLE FOR WORK: Of course. That’s why I’m applying.

PREFERRED HOURS: 1:30 – 3:30pm., Monday, Tuesday and Thursday.

DO YOU HAVE ANY SPECIAL SKILLS?: Yes, but they’re better suited to a more intimate environment.

MAY WE CONTACT YOUR CURRENT EMPLOYER?: If I had one, would I be here?

DO YOU HAVE ANY PHYSICAL CONDITIONS THAT WOULD PROHIBIT YOU FROM LIFTING UPTO 50lbs?: 50lbs. of what?

DO YOU HAVE A CAR?: I think the appropriate question here would be “Do you have a car that runs?”

HAVE YOU RECEIVED ANY SPECIAL AWARDS OR RECOGNITION?: I may already be the winner of the Publishers Clearinghouse Sweepstakes.

DO YOU SMOKE?: On the job, no, on my breaks, yes.

WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE DOING IN FIVE YEARS?: Living in the Bahamas with a fabulously wealthy dumb blond supermodel who thinks I’m the greatest thing since sliced bread. Actually, I’d like to be doing that now.

DO YOU CERTIFY THAT THE ABOVE IS TRUE AND COMPLETE TO THE BEST OF YOUR KNOWLEDGE?: Yes. Absolutely.

SIGN HERE: Aries.

[daripper]

Funny stuff I had a friend that would always write in
where it says SEX he would always write YES PLEASE!!!!!
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[herk]

Your friend is funnier that the app.

[nightowl]

that was good ....got my chuckle today
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[annarere1960]

rofl......this was great ......
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The heaviest baggage for a traveler is an empty wallet.

[tkboxer]

Too funny, smart kid...good sense of humor and can actually write. He won't be at MickeyD's for long.
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No matter how many times you try...you can't clone the dirt off your screen.

[sawtooth]

ROFLMAO

[1Bullet]

I got a job, but I think it time to go apply for an other that I don't need.

Thats good.

[kizo1]

made my night very frigging funny

[fredo]

that's some funny stuff.

One time i had to fill something in like this too, i did it while my mother in law was listening, when we came to the sex field i said SEX => a lot

I'll never forget my mother in law's face EVER !
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Better let people think ur a fool then open ur mouth and remove al doubt.

[bobflemming]

nice one
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A day without wine is like a day without sunshine -hic!

[meezercrazy]

OMG!! That's Funny!!! LOL!!!

[fatheralice]

That was good - I hope he can keep his SOH working there though!

[Loenie]

nice one